The Beginning of Getting Back to Work

It was June. I was grateful for the time to continue to work on my wellbeing; my health journey. I had implemented actions to better myself day after day. Not yet back to work, I had created a weekly schedule to ensure I was not just sitting around in the apartment. The countdown was on to getting my license back, I was getting ready to go be with family out west, I was back to working out regularly, practicing yoga weekly, participating in spin classes, and being outside more in general. 

If you haven’t read my other posts, I always say my heart belongs on the east coast close to the ocean, and my soul on the west coast in the mountains. Going to visit family in June for a few weeks would prove how far I’d come in my journey, and provide joy in my soul before going back to work. 

I showed up out west, and one of the first things my cousin said to me was, “You look so happy.” The last time I saw her, I didn’t realize it until I was on my way home, that I had entered a true depressive episode. This time when I saw her, after months of working on my health and wellbeing, she could tell immediately how far I had come. I was at peace with my diagnoses, I felt calm, and full of joy. Now I was excited to be spending time with her as well! 

Having the opportunity to go to Jasper, Kananaskis, and Canmore fueled my soul! Hiking, camping in a wicked roof top tent, Nordic Spa with an incredible view of the mountains. Just walking around the towns with friends and family was so lovely. Perfect getaway before going back to work (even though I did not have a start date yet). 

I for sure thought I would be back to work by July, however life had other plans. It was an interesting process that led to unnecessary (in my opinion) stress. With no start date for work, I did have an exciting date coming up quickly. This was a day I was impatiently waiting for for well over a year. July 19… the day I got my license back, the day I got to finally drive again, the day I felt my whole world beaming with happiness!

Ecstatic did not even begin to describe how I was feeling that day! It may seem silly, but the very first thing I did was blast my favorite song, and drove to get an iced vanilla latte from a cafe I love! After that, where it was a Wednesday, it was my morning to be in the yoga studio. I walked in BEAMING with positive energy. I took the longest way home that day just to enjoy having the privilege of driving again. Not a day went by where I did not appreciate having this privilege back. 

Having this new found freedom/independence did not give me permission to stop implementing everything else that has helped me get to where I am today. Making a conscious effort to get up in the mornings, make my breakfast before coffee, journaling, getting goutside, going to the gym, working now on my IHP health Coaching Business, reading, etc. I was able to implement even more of what brings me joy; paddle boarding, morning spin classes, yoga workshops, volleyball. It was amazing. 

Seizure free since January 19, medication stable,and I was sleeping pretty well (something my medication affected for quite some time). I had the opportunity to go out west, I had the privilege of having my car; Life was pretty freaking sweet… There was however, one battle that was more exhausting than I thought and wanted it to be… advocating for my return to work. 

Days went by, and I was enjoying my independence. However, I was now experiencing a new found stress. There were a few people in my corner who wanted to help me have a safe, successful return to work. Others made it feel more challenging. In my opinion, the summer could, and should have been less stressful. Don’t get me wrong, I did have a lovely fun summer! I was not stressed about returning to work, I was stressed due to being left out of the conversation, all of the unknowns, going week by week wondering if anyone was going to contact me with any updates. With the shortage of nurses, I did not think it would take so much time and effort to get me back to work. 

All of the unknowns and lack of communication began to affect me in a negative way. I had come way too far for something this ridiculous to set me back. I knew I was ready to get back to work, and introduce that normalcy into my life. I ended up applying for a new job because I just wanted to get back, and be done with the agonizing process of dealing with people who I felt were challenging to deal with. I finally had a job, with an action plan in place and a start date. FINALLY! September 20 I would be returning to the hospital I had been away from for 17 months, working in a brand new unit, a new speciality, new staff (to me). This was about to be a whole lot of change. 

Sometimes change is just what is needed to grow as an individual. And I feel getting back to work on this new unit is the perfect next step towards my new normal. 

Until Next Time…

Thank you for taking the time to come with me along this wild journey to my new normal. I decided to take a step back from writing over the summer so I could just enjoy my time. Writing has been a great outlet, and I am looking forward to continuing to share my journey. 

Not everyone wants to share their journey, which is totally okay! Not everyone wants to talk about negative experiences, but we all have a story. I have chosen to share mine, to let others know they are not alone in whatever they may be facing.

I have experienced some really amazing things in life to date, and have had multiple bumps in the road which I will be sharing. Journey to My New Normal is just that, a journey; the good, the great, the bad, the ugly. Without change, without setbacks, without challenges, there is little room for growth. It is up to us how we use our challenges to shape up for the better.